Saturday, March 7, 2009

Dilema

Heres my question ya'll-right after school started this year, the son of my next door neighbor divorced from his wife and he and his 7yr old son moved back in. He and the grandmother walked over one day and asked if I would be willing to watch the boy for about an hour everyday after the kids got off the school bus. I said yes, but Alexis (my daughter) doesnt ride the bus I pick her up every day.Well thats ok the son can just ride the bus.. ok.... decided...what would you charge?I thought about it and said how about 25.oo a week? ok perfect. Well the first couple of weeks went just fine get off the bus, have a snack. homework play a bit and dads here. Then the hour starts turning into an hour 10 min-15 you get the idea. Dad gets laid off for a week or so, still sends son over each day dont want to disrupt the schedule. In the mean time son gets kicked off bus... dad says can you pick son up also, ill pay extra .... ok no problem.This week pick up both childrens at school at 300 sharp-bring home, snack, homework play time...400 comes and goes 500 comes and goes 530 comes and goes 615 arrives and so does grandma. Im worried no phone call. no nothing Im thinking something has happened. So I say to grandma.... everything ok? she looks at me all crazy and says yeah why? well it 615 I thought maybe dad forgot kiddo (insert nervous laugh)
no no no she says he got a new job hes working 2nd shift. WTF?? since when and noone told me? grandma says he wont be picked up untill 600 every night... well hell thats 3 hours a night times 5 this is no longer im helping a guy out .. this is now a J O B....and mind you we have soccer practice on tue at 600 and church on Wed at 515. So all week I figure dad will come over during the day and visit with me about the new schedule /new phone numbers for emergency/and to be honest raise in pay. Never once did the man walk over. Last night good ole grandma picks kiddo up 615 and hands me 25.oo I look at it and say as nicely as I can this wont do. I have watched son for 15 hours this week, fed said son dinner all week / did homework all week/snack all week... this just isnt enough. She gets all up in her self and says well he just got this new job..... he used to pick son up at 530 right???? noooo >>Well from now on just send him home at 530 then???WTF again its still 2 1/2 hours
so she walks away all huffy/its now 300 in the afternoon on sat and dad still hasn't walked over to talk with me. I feel used/disrespected and down right pissed off. Am I justified or am I out of line??
help me out ya'll

13 comments:

dykewife said...

you're well justified in feeling resentful and used. i would suggest telling them that you can no longer take care of their son after school, and that they find a good day care or after school program for him to go to. give them until the end of next week or the week after...and tell them that you're going to want $100 per week for those two weeks.

it's nasty of them to take advantage of your kindness like that.

kristi said...

Nope, you are right. He needs to put him in daycare.

Rhonda said...

march over there and be assertive!\
You know that's what I do best!
hahahahahahaha
you really don't want advice from me.

just say no?
just say nothing?
just freak out?
just keep doing it? for free?
just say no?

Tanyetta said...

$25/week???????????????? Gas costs MORE than that on a good day.
NOPE!!!!!!

Paula my dear,

Here's the Rule of Thumb whenever someone/anyone ever asks you to do anything.

Especially when it comes to something that just might INCONVENIENCE your life and your current way of living.

BEFORE you give them an answer....

ALWAYS say, Let me think about it.

This way you'll have a chance to discuss it with your best blog girlfriends here and in real life of course and we can tell you to tell them HELL NO, there's a daycare or aftercare program on every corner in the city. HUMPH!

P.S. You're welcome! :) Always glad to help.

cbean said...

I agree with Tanyetta, but because I am anally analytical, I would get it in writing. That way nothing needs to be discussed when lines get crossed. At 3:05 I would be calling child protective services and tell them the child has been abandoned.

Salesdiva said...

Ditto Tanyetta...but Imma have to add that I would NIP this in the bud immediately. Since he won't walk over to talk to you...I'd marc over there PDQ and tell him that come Tuesday, I hope he has new arrangements for his son cause you are D.O.N.E. You can throw a contract on his counter with said new price (if you are still willing to do this with a raise) and if it is not signed with a two week advance (as most daycare centers would require, and aftercare programs require payment or a deposit up front) then I guess his son will be sitting at school and he can expect a call from the school cause it aint' your responsibility. Thank you and have a blessed day.

Believer said...

Here by way of Tanyetta. ;)

You'll lose the "friendly" term concerning your neighbors, but in this case, you don't mind because you were last on their list. Why am I not surprised?!

I say get a piece a paper out and a calculator, see what that works out to hourly, and give it as evidence that you're not being compensated properly.

Remember, you're worth more, and some folk need convincing.

All the best in your dilemma!

Tanyetta said...

We have YOUR back Paula!

Remember from now on, check with us and we'll make sure NO ONE else tries to take advantage of you.

I can't believe he had the nerve to NOT WALK OVER to pick up HIS CHILD!

UGH!

Olivia Hernandez said...

I'm here from Tanyetta's page too!

WTF seriously? I babysit like that, every morning my son's friend comes over and I take them to school together. On early days I have him for a couple of hours, as well as school holidays. If his parents did this, even the first day when the father had the new job/hours without informing you, I would have had words right then. And to be honest the gate swings both ways you can walk over there and initiate the conversation as well. They are only taking advantage because you let them, people suck like that. I would cut the whole situation off immediately.

YouToldHarpoTaBeatMe said...

That's some kind of ungrateful. He really needs to "man up" and stop sending his Mom over. He knows he's wrong and that's why he's sending his Mom over, instead of facing you and making arrangements himself.

Talk about looking a gift horse in the mouth.

Afterschool care costs far more than what he's giving you. Lame.

fdiary said...

Shut this down immediately! They are taking advantage for sure! You should be getting at the very least $85 to $100 per week. They need to provide all the food, drinks, hand santizers, toliet paper, everything! If they are 1 to 30 minutes late picking up their child, there is a $25 late fee. Anything after 30 minutes is $50.00. Anything after 5-7 hours call Child Protective Services.

Let them sign a After-School Child Care Contract and make sure you comply with your State's Depart. of Social Services or Child Care Resources to be able to watch child(ren). Watching someone else's child is a major responsibility and risk if something should happen to the child in your care. Do everything the right way legally. No favors, because that stuff - as you have already found out - can bite you in the behind!

Jaycee said...

Why can't grandma take care of him? She's the one that's been coming to pick him up. I'm sure she's the caretaker til he gets off his new shift. I think they just volunteered you to be this boys new momma. Yep, you got hosed. End this now or you'll regret it. I speak from experience.

Tanyetta said...

Just stopping by to check on you! How are things going with this?